Not my words
I tend to think that most of what old KV wrote was wonderful and prophetic...so for me to lay out some lengthy paragraph about it is lame...here's an article I unearthed from the ever-loving www.
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Many years ago, I was so innocent I still considered it possible that we could become the humane and reasonable America so many members of my generation used to dream of. We dreamed of such an America during the Great Depression, when there were no jobs. And then we fought and often died for that dream during the Second World War, when there was no peace.
But I know now that there is not a chance in hell of America’s becoming humane and reasonable. Because power corrupts us, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Human beings are chimpanzees who get crazy drunk on power. By saying that our leaders are power-drunk chimpanzees, am I in danger of wrecking the morale of our soldiers fighting and dying in the Middle East? Their morale, like so many bodies, is already shot to pieces. They are being treated, as I never was, like toys a rich kid got for Christmas.
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When you get to my age, if you get to my age, which is 81, and if you have reproduced, you will find yourself asking your own children, who are themselves middle-aged, what life is all about. I have seven kids, four of them adopted.
Many of you reading this are probably the same age as my grandchildren. They, like you, are being royally shafted and lied to by our Baby Boomer corporations and government.
I put my big question about life to my biological son Mark. Mark is a pediatrician, and author of a memoir, The Eden Express. It is about his crackup, straightjacket and padded cell stuff, from which he recovered sufficiently to graduate from Harvard Medical School.
Dr. Vonnegut said this to his doddering old dad: “Father, we are here to help each other get through this thing, whatever it is.” So I pass that on to you. Write it down, and put it in your computer, so you can forget it.
I have to say that’s a pretty good sound bite, almost as good as, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” A lot of people think Jesus said that, because it is so much the sort of thing Jesus liked to say. But it was actually said by Confucius, a Chinese philosopher, 500 years before there was that greatest and most humane of human beings, named Jesus Christ.
The Chinese also gave us, via Marco Polo, pasta and the formula for gunpowder. The Chinese were so dumb they only used gunpowder for fireworks. And everybody was so dumb back then that nobody in either hemisphere even knew that there was another one.
But back to people, like Confucius and Jesus and my son the doctor, Mark, who’ve said how we could behave more humanely, and maybe make the world a less painful place. One of my favorites is Eugene Debs, from Terre Haute in my native state of Indiana. Get a load of this:
Eugene Debs, who died back in 1926, when I was only 4, ran 5 times as the Socialist Party candidate for president, winning 900,000 votes, 6 percent of the popular vote, in 1912, if you can imagine such a ballot. He had this to say while campaigning:
As long as there is a lower class, I am in it.
As long as there is a criminal element, I’m of it.
As long as there is a soul in prison, I am not free.
Doesn’t anything socialistic make you want to throw up? Like great public schools or health insurance for all?
How about Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, the Beatitudes?
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the Earth.
Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God. …
And so on.
Not exactly planks in a Republican platform. Not exactly Donald Rumsfeld or Dick Cheney stuff.
For some reason, the most vocal Christians among us never mention the Beatitudes. But, often with tears in their eyes, they demand that the Ten Commandments be posted in public buildings. And of course that’s Moses, not Jesus. I haven’t heard one of them demand that the Sermon on the Mount, the Beatitudes, be posted anywhere.
“Blessed are the merciful” in a courtroom? “Blessed are the peacemakers” in the Pentagon? Give me a break!
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There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don’t know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.
But, when you stop to think about it, only a nut case would want to be a human being, if he or she had a choice. Such treacherous, untrustworthy, lying and greedy animals we are!
I was born a human being in 1922 A.D. What does “A.D.” signify? That commemorates an inmate of this lunatic asylum we call Earth who was nailed to a wooden cross by a bunch of other inmates. With him still conscious, they hammered spikes through his wrists and insteps, and into the wood. Then they set the cross upright, so he dangled up there where even the shortest person in the crowd could see him writhing this way and that.
Can you imagine people doing such a thing to a person?
No problem. That’s entertainment. Ask the devout Roman Catholic Mel Gibson, who, as an act of piety, has just made a fortune with a movie about how Jesus was tortured. Never mind what Jesus said.
During the reign of King Henry the Eighth, founder of the Church of England, he had a counterfeiter boiled alive in public. Show biz again.
Mel Gibson’s next movie should be The Counterfeiter. Box office records will again be broken.
One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.
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And what did the great British historian Edward Gibbon, 1737-1794 A.D., have to say about the human record so far? He said, “History is indeed little more than the register of the crimes, follies and misfortunes of mankind.”
The same can be said about this morning’s edition of the New York Times.
The French-Algerian writer Albert Camus, who won a Nobel Prize for Literature in 1957, wrote, “There is but one truly serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide.”
So there’s another barrel of laughs from literature. Camus died in an automobile accident. His dates? 1913-1960 A.D.
Listen. All great literature is about what a bummer it is to be a human being: Moby Dick, Huckleberry Finn, The Red Badge of Courage, the Iliad and the Odyssey, Crime and Punishment, the Bible and The Charge of the Light Brigade.
But I have to say this in defense of humankind: No matter in what era in history, including the Garden of Eden, everybody just got there. And, except for the Garden of Eden, there were already all these crazy games going on, which could make you act crazy, even if you weren’t crazy to begin with. Some of the games that were already going on when you got here were love and hate, liberalism and conservatism, automobiles and credit cards, golf and girls’ basketball.
Even crazier than golf, though, is modern American politics, where, thanks to TV and for the convenience of TV, you can only be one of two kinds of human beings, either a liberal or a conservative.
Actually, this same sort of thing happened to the people of England generations ago, and Sir William Gilbert, of the radical team of Gilbert and Sullivan, wrote these words for a song about it back then:
I often think it’s comical
How nature always does contrive
That every boy and every gal
That’s born into the world alive
Is either a little Liberal
Or else a little Conservative.
Which one are you in this country? It’s practically a law of life that you have to be one or the other? If you aren’t one or the other, you might as well be a doughnut.
If some of you still haven’t decided, I’ll make it easy for you.
If you want to take my guns away from me, and you’re all for murdering fetuses, and love it when homosexuals marry each other, and want to give them kitchen appliances at their showers, and you’re for the poor, you’re a liberal.
If you are against those perversions and for the rich, you’re a conservative.
What could be simpler?
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My government’s got a war on drugs. But get this: The two most widely abused and addictive and destructive of all substances are both perfectly legal.
One, of course, is ethyl alcohol. And President George W. Bush, no less, and by his own admission, was smashed or tiddley-poo or four sheets to the wind a good deal of the time from when he was 16 until he was 41. When he was 41, he says, Jesus appeared to him and made him knock off the sauce, stop gargling nose paint.
Other drunks have seen pink elephants.
And do you know why I think he is so pissed off at Arabs? They invented algebra. Arabs also invented the numbers we use, including a symbol for nothing, which nobody else had ever had before. You think Arabs are dumb? Try doing long division with Roman numerals.
We’re spreading democracy, are we? Same way European explorers brought Christianity to the Indians, what we now call “Native Americans.”
How ungrateful they were! How ungrateful are the people of Baghdad today.
So let’s give another big tax cut to the super-rich. That’ll teach bin Laden a lesson he won’t soon forget. Hail to the Chief.
That chief and his cohorts have as little to do with Democracy as the Europeans had to do with Christianity. We the people have absolutely no say in whatever they choose to do next. In case you haven’t noticed, they’ve already cleaned out the treasury, passing it out to pals in the war and national security rackets, leaving your generation and the next one with a perfectly enormous debt that you’ll be asked to repay.
Nobody let out a peep when they did that to you, because they have disconnected every burglar alarm in the Constitution: The House, the Senate, the Supreme Court, the FBI, the free press (which, having been embedded, has forsaken the First Amendment) and We the People.
About my own history of foreign substance abuse. I’ve been a coward about heroin and cocaine and LSD and so on, afraid they might put me over the edge. I did smoke a joint of marijuana one time with Jerry Garcia and the Grateful Dead, just to be sociable. It didn’t seem to do anything to me, one way or the other, so I never did it again. And by the grace of God, or whatever, I am not an alcoholic, largely a matter of genes. I take a couple of drinks now and then, and will do it again tonight. But two is my limit. No problem.
I am of course notoriously hooked on cigarettes. I keep hoping the things will kill me. A fire at one end and a fool at the other.
But I’ll tell you one thing: I once had a high that not even crack cocaine could match. That was when I got my first driver’s license! Look out, world, here comes Kurt Vonnegut.
And my car back then, a Studebaker, as I recall, was powered, as are almost all means of transportation and other machinery today, and electric power plants and furnaces, by the most abused and addictive and destructive drugs of all: fossil fuels.
When you got here, even when I got here, the industrialized world was already hopelessly hooked on fossil fuels, and very soon now there won’t be any more of those. Cold turkey.
Can I tell you the truth? I mean this isn’t like TV news, is it?
Here’s what I think the truth is: We are all addicts of fossil fuels in a state of denial, about to face cold turkey.
And like so many addicts about to face cold turkey, our leaders are now committing violent crimes to get what little is left of what we’re hooked on.
In the water, he was beautiful...
Well folks, the world is a little more real today, since we've lost old Kurt to the aliens of Trafalmador or the hostesses at the Monkey House. I woke this moring to a text from Positive T...our good buddy Vonnegut is dead at the grand old age of 84. I was kind of determined not to be sad...and I succeeded until about 11:50 AM...the sky was a "scrubbed grey" and it was sort-of raining...I had a headache from too much coffee and then I got on the bus...everything was muted and fuzzy, and I wondered who would ever poke fun at the world now?
[insert clever title here]
I should put out a 'zine...I kind of think i know what it is I want to focus on in this here academic setting, and it's creative writing. I think that I know what it is I want to pursue, and it's publishing and editing...I think I know how much money I want to make and it's a whole bunch. The things I'm not sure about? What to have for lunch, where to live in 5 weeks...where to work in the meantime. All of you are free to give me your critical feedback of these plans...Someone said once that I was a good writer, but they wanted to sleep with me, so I'm not sure how much I trust them...and looking critically at my own 43 posts, I'm not sure I can say that they are totally fantastically riviting...but I like reading them...So I'm going to my advisor today and I am bringing this revalation to her attention, and I'll probably have to sign up for poetry class (gag) and perhaps a critical analysis seminar (yawn) but it sure beats physics!
I don't understand...
My head is muddled with all sorts of information that I can't seem to keep straight...Average Total Cost, how to spell the name Hepzibah, how to tell a Suni from a Shia, what to eat for a midnight snack...I blame the fact that the computer lab smells like a hotel room...over laundered sheets and towels and air conditioning...with no circulation...oddly enough, it's not a bad smell, and makes me think of being with him that last night...and what could have been...damn the way the heart can turn with just a phone call!
Remind me to tell you about Mike sometime...
He called me tonight...after a reconciliation three months (or more) overdue...for both of us...finally, we have broken though our mutual bullshit...or at least decided to get over it...we've grown up enough to finally call each other to talk about cartoons and more cartoons and then onto serious topics like houses and word choice...this is a short post, due to the economics homework burning a hole in my backpack...but oh man am I glad he called me back.
Strictly for my Ninjas
It's great when you have to look down at your t-shirt to find out how to spell a word. Last night was ok...I saw some good guys, and had some stiff drinks...who knew that I liked Vodka and Cranberry juice? (not me). I ran into Werner, who spent the first half of the evening keeping away from me, and the last half cornering me. My dad showed up for a moment to join us for a drink, and I was so happy to have dad-o help me turn my back to Werner. Later, drunker...I needed a ride home, so Werner took me, and then we talked for the better part of an hour about our potential friendship. Have you ever read a Janne Austen novel, seen a britsh movie, or heard Eddie Izzard's stand-up routine about either? Crushes are like those three things...a glance, a meaningful word, an accidental bump down a corridor, a 2 minute dance at a ball...and suddenly you're entranced with someone...do they know how you feel? Do you know how you feel? You wait for a letter, a second glance, a bit of gossip...and all the while, social propriety stops you from marching over to the person and making like third-graders..."I like you, do you like me?" But when you cross that line...you have left yourself open for the most crushing attack..."No...I don't."...That's why I've been all about the secret crush...living my life pretending I wasn't in love with the boys that I so desperately wanted to smooch...some, it may have worked out...some I know it would have exploded in a stinky mess...and all in all, I'm glad I didn't make that move, but in at the time, I wish I'd had the guts...so in that respect, I'm glad that Werner can be so honest with his feelings and desires...he wants to be my boy, and he doesn't let me forget it...but I tell you true...it's not happening. Sorry W. I hate the idea of turning down a chance to be desired...but at what cost? I'm not dealing with this nonsense right now...it was nice and fun while it lasted, but it's time to let go. Perhpas I'm shooting myself in the foot...turning down my last chance at happiness...(Jinx's snorts with laughter at this point...so does Ninja's inner Tricky...) I'm not gonna just take what I can get, love-wise. I may not know the love of my life yet...and I sure don't think that I met him last night (although there were some hotties there) and it's real nice to feel eyes on you from across the room...but those eyes can be an admirier or a stalker...and one is definately different from the other.
But it feels so right...
Is it wrong to leave class and hide in the ladies room texting a boy? Is it wrong to talk to someone that hasn't shown any interest in me? Is it wrong to tell someone to "shut the fuck up"? Is it wrong to want to be rich (I mean, like, 1920's Vanderbilt rich, accounting for inflation)? Is it wrong to talk to a little kid at the bus stop, even though her mom probably told her NOT to talk to strangers? Is it wrong to hold a kid's hand while they step down from the bus? Is it wrong to watch three movies in a day, on a school night? Is it wrong to like Everclear (the old 90's band, not the slammin' beverage)? Is it wrong to tag along with my sister's friends to go bowling? Do my jeans smell? Did I forget to wear a bra? My dad and I are going to the same nice restaurant tonight for dinner, with different groups and under different circumstances...but it makes me feel like I'm a little better off then I think...is that wrong?
knowing my coffee order...
I have a regular coffee shop...awakenings...i have developed an affinity for espresso shots, which they pour to taste like caramel, and I down with one or two gulps...I know it's uncooth, but I'm in Ohio...where it's still pronounced EX-presso. Anyway, I go in almost every morning, as it is right down the block from work, and frankly, it's the only time I can get a decent cuppa. There are the various assortment of barista boys...I only know two by name and while neither of them are crushable (to me), they sometimes upgrade my drink order to double shots, and never charge me for soymilk. Anyway, today...the "other" barista...the part-time graphic designer...was behind the counter, and called out my order before I could...it's the little things like that, on a chilly spring morning that kind of feel like a hug and a smooch. Tonight I am invited to an "evening" at a fancy restaurant by the bachelors of cincinnati...and I'm going, even though it might be a farce...I have the VCR set to tape The Office, and my roommates are advising me on make-up tips and clothing...and I just hope there's someone there worth talking to. And I hope there's a decent meal...cafeteria food sits kinda heavy, you know?
Mt. Everest
Last night, I spoke with my dear friend Angela, whom I miss very much...and I was happy to talk to her and hear her musical laugh in my ear and think of her in her cute apartment, snug as a bug under a blanket...this morning I woke to the smell of spring and freshly washed hair and the sight of budding daffodills, a letter from my dad including an article about Burlington Vermont and a horoscope that said it's time for forgive and move on...I'm choosing life today. I am being too hard on myself and the world right now, and I'm going to try and stop doing that. I'm going to listen to my favorite songs and walk outside as much as I can and revel in my 4th A+ paper (whoo-hoo!)...read the article my dad sent me and remember the beauty. This life is mine...I chose to do it and I choose to like it or hate it. Getting drunk doesn't help...watching 5 hours of TV doesn't help...and being all weepy doesn't help. G-lo gave me some good advice, and by gum, I'm gonna do it. I miss hugs and smooching with friends who walked into my life...but it'll come back...plus...at least I'm wearing my favorite t-shirt. Smile, dudes...I'm eating chili fries.
Just...breathe
Panic crisis over...or abated anyways. The sun is out, the snadals are on...and I had an actual full night of sleep last night, due to the fact that I have decided to sleep on the couch for the rest of my time here in "roommate hell". Plus, four of my very dear friends became parents in the last 8 days!! We welcome to the world Alexander Matthew Taber and Lily Jane Larson...the new lights of the world! My nerdy friends have babies!! The boys that I grew up with, drank too much with and (ahem) other assorted debauchery are now sleepless dads...with groggy wives who are real troopers and will make the most wonderful moms. There's nothing like babies to turn frowns upside down...and as an added bonus, I recieved multiple pictures of the new babes and my three girls from VT...Mo, Bev and C-ya are three sisters with whom I have an unabashed crush on...I've known Mo since she was in the womb...and loved the family since I first set eyes on them. C-ya will turn one year old in a matter of weeks...and she is climbing the stairs and making lots of noise each time I call. Middle sis Bev is cute as ever, with more and more of here dad's family coming out in her features...Oh, my babies...I did wake up to the startling news that I have a test today...a test I could have been studying for the entire spring break...but now have 4 hours to prepare...I called off work in the interest of maintianing my GPA...I wish I could maintain my bank account and still ace this theology exam...but choices must be made. After the test, I'll have the afternoon off and I'm not sure what to do about that...you know what I need...a good solid crush...on a boy...
That's the Cincinnati way!
Here's what you do if you're really from the 'nati...after a rant...after you've blown your top and been really honest...or even beyond honest...and used too many swear words...you apologise...and that's what I'm going to do...I'm sorry dear reader...I'm sorry I can't turn this frown upside down...I'm sorry I can't seem to remain positive even as the temps rise (thank god...I'm not wearing a jacket!) and I'm sorry I'm such a goddamn pill when I don't get my way. I'm sorry that I place such am importance on being special in someone else's eyes. I'm sorry I look a gift horse like a free haircut and dinner out in the mouth. I'm sorry that I wasted even one minute of one day of my break...although I did spend a great deal of time on the couch watching "crappy" movies that I laughed at often. I'm sorry I drink too much and I'm sorry I forgot how to rock.
I want a good job...I want to make a decent even great paycheck that will allow me to take a vacation in a place other then my parent's house. I want a boyfriend. I want to go to a rock show and sit in the front row. I want my own bedroom, bathroom and kitchen. I want another weekend with my brothers' girlfriends and I want them to want to impress me. I want to be worth more than just a diploma with Bachelors of _______ written on it. I want a pretty new dress and fancy shoes. I want to smile again and mean it. I want to feel less like a reject on the sidewalk and more like a hand painted porcelin urn for $2500. I want you to want me. I need you to need me...Id' love you to love me...and yes, you did see me cryin'...but not for fucking long.
f*cking f*ckity f*ck
Alrighty...that last few posts just seems pathetic...not so much the idea of clinging to the small things in life...but the dwelling on the even more insignificant crappy details. This was my spring break, goddammit...and I spent the whole break wanting just to be back at school, a welcome distraction from what I considered (in the 3AM of being drunk at my parents house) my crappy life. My life is not crappy...I know I know...but dammit...when is it going to feel as awesome as it used to?
I have been back in O-Hi-O for less than 2 months, and I still get the thrill of seeing people with Bengals sweatshirts and Ohio plates on their cars: "hey...I'm from Hamilton County!...Wait...I'm IN Hamilton county" And yet I've been out of VT long enough to wonder if I ever really lived there. I'm serious...I wonder where that life went...where are the rock shows...the Long Trail (beer)...the delicious food? The people my own age??
This past week was spent working and dwelling...working at the shop, whose business is in the shitter...a shop where it's difficult to want to stay when you sell only $80 worth of merch per day...and then when I'm not working, I was volunteering...setting up a fund raiser for my brother's school and waiting for the weekend when my other brother's would be in town with their significant others...I had hoped the weekend would be a much needed relief from my doldrums...but can you honestly hang with 50 or so suburban moms and with their huge diamond rings and fancy cars and really feel like you're going to surpass their economic bracket...and if I do...what else would I have to spend my time and money on then my children...I know this shit doesn't make much sense...but trust me....the whole vibe in OH is different...it's like being in a Jane Austen novel...women get married and pop out babies and then take care of them...and if they don't, they are independently wealthy and they have lots of houses and perhaps a horse or a plane. I was trying to find someone at the fund raiser to speak to who had a child that dropped out of college...and it just isn't done here...the kids my age all finish school and walk down the aisle or into their dad's law firm...or out of their parents lives and are never spoken of again...me...I'm the random 30 year old that the parents all say it'll get better...but behind my back they warn their kids about me..."Do you want to end up like Ninja? Living with 19 year olds and working at a failing shop on the failing square? she can't even afford new clothes!" and I can't...I got a haircut this week...my parents paid for it...I had my makeup done for the event because I have broken out so much it's embarrassing...I went to a lovely restaurant...all on someone else's dime...because my dimes are actually pennies...but what am I bitching about!?!? I have a supportive family...a group of people that help me when I need it...I'm in a place with no chance of the heat or electricity getting turned off...I have buddies that remind me with comments on this here blog that I'm being listened to...what the f*ck is my problem?
The tiny list of things that are great
1. a clean kitchen and bathroom
2. a week of silence in my "house"
3. a new haircut
4. food in the pantry (including the ingredients to make "the meal that makes me feel rich")
5. Violent Femmes, Prodigy and Everclear coming on the radio at the most appropriate times
i know...i know...i'm not the best girlfriend ever
ok...so i thought that spring break would be a time that i could leisurely update the blog with pictures and all the diary entries I've been compiling...and no...I've been working and walking all over creation and riding the fucking bus with all sorts of god-knows-who...and I have been hit with the doldrums ever so hard. not even the doldrums...the depression. Yes...I'm unhappy. I hate to admist it, and perhaps that's why I'm staying away from the blog...but it's true...I'm not happy. Not so unhapy to know that moving wasn't the right desicision...but it's hard to be in a place with no friends. and I mean...no...friends...I'm technically on "spring break" and I was supposed to go away for a few days...but I'm too broke to leave Cincinnati...and all I can do is ride the bus from campus to work and back agan, and sometimes I can;t even afford to ride the bus, so I have to walk...to a campus where I've developed a tendancy to drink more bloody mary's than I should...or to a work that is doing less business per day than I get paid...and I wonder...will this ever get better?
Sunday bloody sunday...I wish
I had a good thing going for two weeks straight...a steady meeting with a non-XU-student...for interesting conversation and bloody mary's. I love a good bloody mary. Does anyone remember the Waiting Room...with the toothpick full of tomolives and cocktail onions...dang. I tried to get our on-campus bar to make me a bloody last night, but they didn't have the stuff to fix it...lacking the tomato juice. I debated just getting a "mary"...but I actually hate vodka when it's not clothed in horseradish laden tomato...so I opted for a beer...my first since Sunday, as I am trying to go back to the no-wheat no dairy eating habits. It's hard in the cafeteria setting...but it's given me one more thing to think about...like I need it!
This week kind of kicked my ass with mid-terms. My Physics test was difficult, and so I studied extra special hard for the Econ midterm, which I went into feeling prepared, and left feeling like I did my best. Has anyone read Paradise Lost...I'm not a fan, and that's what we're reading in Lit. class this week. Milton uses seven words when 1 will do...like Dickens...I know it's a poem and the language is supposed to be flowery...but I've opted for the on-line study guide...whose music is a synthesized version of the Death Star theme from Star Wars. Somehow making P.L into a Star Wars parody makes it more palatable. I wonder if I can find an all-lego reenactment of the epic? (Paradise Lost...not Star Wars). It snowed again this weekend...but nothing like the snow in VT. I kind of wish I could be up there, seeing the 10ft snowbanks on Church Street and hosting a City Market Slumber Party at my old apartment...I thank all of you that have sent me pictures. Speaking of pictures...I have another installment of Lavatory Tour 2007...and more fun ice pictures...but I desperately need coffee, as my eyelids are heavy, and it's only 3PM! Have I mentioned the lack of decent coffee on campus...the cafeteria has decaf coffee...but vanilla flavored regular brew...and the on-campus coffee shop sucks worse than a gas station coffee shop. I want to jump over the counter and show them ow to make coffee. Plus, the only soy milk they have...vanilla...what is the deal with the kids and their vanilla coffee? Wierdly, the best coffee I can find...at Subway...yes...that Subway...the place where you can eat a huge sandwich and lose weight...also has the only decent cuppa in town. Can I get my mayo on the side,. please?
Celebrating 30 posts...and being with the family
Tonight, I sleep at home...in a nice bed in a room by myself and a house full of food and good booze. My sister and I went out for drinks tonight, to hang together and so she could flirt with this guy that we met a few weeks ago. It was awkward...but whatever...it was different and I'm off campus. Now I'm hanging with my brother...listening to Reel Big Fish and watching him make rollercoasters on rollercoaster tycoon, with the big tv (with cable!!) on in the background and blogging away on the other computer...I feel like I've made it!
More lavatories...
Is this weird...who cares!
This is the bathroom at my apartment...technically not a public lav, as I have to share it with three other women as well as whomever they have over at the time. Last night, one of the boyfriends came over and used the facilities, and walked out without washing his hands...all I could think about was "what of mine will he touch and I have to disinfect?" I have gotten much more germaphobic since being in this new living situation...I can't belive that my roommate would let him touch her without washing his hands...but whatever. I love hand sanitizer! I can't make these children do what I want, that's for sure.
the second picture is the Gallagher student center ladies room...ohhh tile floors! ooohhh wall paper! Ohhh...we aren't trusted to even turn the faucet water on ourselves...the only bathroom that is more automated is the science facilities...only because there are lots of students with lots of chemicals running around...and we can't cross-contaminate...getting back to the non-hand-washing-boyfriend...I mean, gross!
This is the bathroom at my apartment...technically not a public lav, as I have to share it with three other women as well as whomever they have over at the time. Last night, one of the boyfriends came over and used the facilities, and walked out without washing his hands...all I could think about was "what of mine will he touch and I have to disinfect?" I have gotten much more germaphobic since being in this new living situation...I can't belive that my roommate would let him touch her without washing his hands...but whatever. I love hand sanitizer! I can't make these children do what I want, that's for sure.
the second picture is the Gallagher student center ladies room...ohhh tile floors! ooohhh wall paper! Ohhh...we aren't trusted to even turn the faucet water on ourselves...the only bathroom that is more automated is the science facilities...only because there are lots of students with lots of chemicals running around...and we can't cross-contaminate...getting back to the non-hand-washing-boyfriend...I mean, gross!
Day two of ice storm 2007
More pictures from the ice storm from last night...it's an ice palace outside...and the air is filled with the tinkling sounds of iced-over branches bouncing off each other. My parents have lost heat and power and have holed up in a hotel...while my apartment is warm and well-lit.
School was cancelled last night at abouot 11:00 PM...and I'm actually a little bummed, just because I had a midterm scheduled for today, and I would much rather get it over with than have to wait until Friday. I studied most of the day and night yesterday...and I made over 50 flashcards of microeconomic terms...and I'm doing more practice tests today...while keeping up with the reading for my lit class and preparing my philosophy essay. I remember dropping out before I even considered doing all this multi-tasking 10 years ago...now I'm older and hopefully wiser...but I still feel like I'm just keeping my head above water.
I'm about to go to the GSC public bathroom...so stay tuned for another edition of public loo tour 2007.
School was cancelled last night at abouot 11:00 PM...and I'm actually a little bummed, just because I had a midterm scheduled for today, and I would much rather get it over with than have to wait until Friday. I studied most of the day and night yesterday...and I made over 50 flashcards of microeconomic terms...and I'm doing more practice tests today...while keeping up with the reading for my lit class and preparing my philosophy essay. I remember dropping out before I even considered doing all this multi-tasking 10 years ago...now I'm older and hopefully wiser...but I still feel like I'm just keeping my head above water.
I'm about to go to the GSC public bathroom...so stay tuned for another edition of public loo tour 2007.
flowers and ice
Here are some images from the last few hours...
These are one of the three plants that are currently gracing my desk at home...I forget what they are called, but they are adding a much needed splash of color to my world.
Theabove pic and the next two are from the campus this morning...the tree in our front yard is encased in ice, and now the temperature is rising and the sleet has turned to full fledged rain. The temps are supposed to drop again tonight, making it a dangerous ice storm once again...
But how pretty everything looks! I'm in my study tower in Gallagher...in the "quiet room" where my typing in the only real noise...I'm about to take my econ practice test...can you tell that I'm procrastinating?
These are one of the three plants that are currently gracing my desk at home...I forget what they are called, but they are adding a much needed splash of color to my world.
Theabove pic and the next two are from the campus this morning...the tree in our front yard is encased in ice, and now the temperature is rising and the sleet has turned to full fledged rain. The temps are supposed to drop again tonight, making it a dangerous ice storm once again...
But how pretty everything looks! I'm in my study tower in Gallagher...in the "quiet room" where my typing in the only real noise...I'm about to take my econ practice test...can you tell that I'm procrastinating?
another snow day!
I woke up this morning to another announcement that the university is closed, classes are cancelled...and I don't even have to go to work today! I feel like a grade school kid again...now, should I go to get iced cream, or take a nap...or study for my econ midterm? I'm actually glad to have the whole day to study, because economics is my most difficult class after Physics...I'm fully expecting my jaw to drop again tomorrw when I turn the test over. Wish me luck!!
Better days and more pictures...
Ok, here is the beginning of the tour of Xavier Bathrooms...while there are lots of differences...the one similarity between all of them (besides the basic toilet, sink, mirror fixtures) is that Xavier students are not trusted to flush the toilets on their own. The first thing that I thought of was: "Maybe this way, nobody can flush a cherry bomb down the toilet?" Here's the other random question...why is Ninja taking us on a tour of the public bathrooms? I'll tell you, kitten...it's because of all the new things in my life...sharing the bathroom and the frequency that I must use the public bathrooms makes me feel that my life is much more temporary that it may, in fact, be. For you see people...when you use a bathroom that it not your own...there are perks, and also letdowns. For one...buying toilet paper and soap is not as high on the shopping list, leaving room for other must-haves like a decent cup of coffee...more on that and the lack of it later...another upside is that someone else cleans the bathroom...usually...which brings me to the downsides...someone else cleans the bathroom...and perhaps not with the frequency that i would like. Also, the quality of products is not always up to snuff. I like to use a nice fragrant hand soap...and perhaps a lotion option would be nice? Alas...I don't attend school at the local country club...so my hands smell of whatever blue goo they use to fill up those dispensers. The other reasons that publis bathrooms make me feel like a transient...simple fact...I can't leave my stuff in there. I used the term school gypsy a few posts ago, and it's really true. I was spoiled, working across the street from my home for two years...I rarely had to bring anything with me...now, I find myself carting my possessions and comforts here there and everywhere. At least my back is getting stronger.
Right now, I only have one picture to share...the bathroom at the Cintas Center...which houses our sports arena and student cafeteria.
Notice the poured concrete floors, the available stalls...the girl at the sink washing her hands...(in the pink shirt) yeah...did she this I was weird...I'm sure she did. You know, I should be taking pictures of the looks people give me when I take a camera into the bathroom. I can only guess what they are thinking.
I did have the privilege of using the bathroom in the Schmitt building on Friday, and I forgot my camera...half on purpose, because I was attending a lecture, and I thought that it was already disruptive that I was excusing myself in the middle...but to walk in and out with my camera would be doubly weird. I'm bummed because it was the only bathroom on campus that I've see with fresh flowers in it. Does anyone watch Seinfeld? I'm not fan, but I devour TV like it's chips and dip, and so I've caught a pair amount...anyway, George has the uncanny ability to find the best public bathrooms all over NYC..perhaps for the spring, I will be able to publish a similar guide to Cincinnati. I'll branch out...I promise...and find other bathrooms...bathrooms where the patrons are trusted to flush.
Notice the poured concrete floors, the available stalls...the girl at the sink washing her hands...(in the pink shirt) yeah...did she this I was weird...I'm sure she did. You know, I should be taking pictures of the looks people give me when I take a camera into the bathroom. I can only guess what they are thinking.
I did have the privilege of using the bathroom in the Schmitt building on Friday, and I forgot my camera...half on purpose, because I was attending a lecture, and I thought that it was already disruptive that I was excusing myself in the middle...but to walk in and out with my camera would be doubly weird. I'm bummed because it was the only bathroom on campus that I've see with fresh flowers in it. Does anyone watch Seinfeld? I'm not fan, but I devour TV like it's chips and dip, and so I've caught a pair amount...anyway, George has the uncanny ability to find the best public bathrooms all over NYC..perhaps for the spring, I will be able to publish a similar guide to Cincinnati. I'll branch out...I promise...and find other bathrooms...bathrooms where the patrons are trusted to flush.
Sgt. Ninja's Broken Hearts Club Band
About to live through another V-day...sigh...not that I don't have anybody to love...I have a heart full of friends and family to express emotion to...and I'm not going to go off on the predictable rant about it being a hallmark holiday...or a pagan sex ritual...nope...I guess just think it's a silly "holiday"...probably because I won't have someone to hug and kiss a million times and maybe it makes me a little heartsick. I mean, I don't want to have a "steady" or anything...but I have needs, you know...I like to be wanted and to feel that same want inside myself. I think that a bit of this is just me feeling a little alone in the world...like nobody really understands me. I think I'm being pulled down by the grey weather today...and the extremely hard physics midterm that I just finished, which makes my brain feel real empty. Going in to the test, I was so positive...and once I turned over the third page...the one with all the diagrams and essay answers...my jaw literally dropped. Oh jeez...this is getting harder by the day, you know? Here's the really crappy part...I was not-as-nice-or-as-thoughtful as I could have been this weekend to one person that I had considered close to me. Yeah, I was backed into a corner, and the fangs and claws came out. Normally, I am proud of myself when I can protect my heart from advances such as these...but not this weekend. It was weird...this boy likes me more than I like him, and it didn't end well. I feel like an asshole...but what can I do? I feel like I have so little in the world...I mean, I've been here in Ohio for one month (on Valentine's Day) and I share a room with a girl who snores...I have nothing but my clothes and poster collection to my name...and 5 classes that are beginning to get difficult...I just want to feel like it's getting better...and I know that it is...but I want to know HOW...the when part doesn't so much matter...but I just feel so uncertain. Like, should I get used to living here? Will I find that super-cool internship (or, better yet, job?) tomorrow? Can I find a nice apartment? Will I ever get my kitty back (I miss her so!)? I'm sorry to be such a debbie downer...things really are not so bad...I came home from work and my one roommate had gotten homemade cookies from her mom and shared them with me while we talked about boys. And the boy that came over yesterday brought me beautiful flowers which he allowed me to keep even after our fight. I gave back the rest of his gifts, including the iced cream, a real stupid move on my part since it was Black Raspberry Chip and iced cream always makes the heart feel better.
This is the best story I've heard this year...and it's all true!
Ok, I went to the XU Game on Wednesday...we won, which is great...good story, right?
Kidding...ok, so we were sitting with one of my dad's associates, and she told us this story about her cousin, that took his son to the Newport Aquarium last weekend. The Newport Aquarium is in Kentucky...right over the river from Cincy. Anyway...the kid, who is 9 years old, got lost and his parents were frantic...they were looking everywhere for him, and after a half an hour of searching, saw him walking down the hallway towards them, without a coat on, shivering. He said that he was freezing and he wanted to go home. They said ok, and took him home quickly. As soon as he got to the house, he ran upstairs and the parents heard bathwater running. Figuring that he was taking a warm bath after being so cold, they went up to check on him and what did they find?
THE KID STOLE A BABY PENGUIN!!!!
I tell you true, folks. He was watching the staff go in and out of the display and sneaked his way in, smuggled out a baby penguin into his backpack and then found his parents and asked to come home!
THE KID STOLE A BABY PENGUIN!!!!
The parents immediately called the Aquarium and then drove back and made the kid return the penguin (of course)...and then proceeded to call every single person they knew.
So, if you want a baby penguin, I know a 9 year old that can help you out.
(The baby penguin is fine and no charges were leveled on this kid, although I imagine that he's not allowed back for a while.)
No pictures today, so far...but I'll post later tonight...I have one more class and then it's the weekend....wheeee!
these pretzels are making me thirsty!
Don't ask me why that's the subject of this next entry...I blame the television. My friend brought over antenna the other night so we could watch the Superbowl, and the television has been on ever since. For those of you that know me, you must know how much I adore tv...it's right there next to sleeping and eating. Well, I have the right (or wrong, depending on your POV) roommates...because they love television as much as I do...perhaps even more. I think that all four of us need to be sleeping for the television to be turned off. I now have to leave the house to get my work done. Today, I even found myself making flashcards in front of the muted TV...it's downhill from here.
As My dearest Angela has pointed out...I have not been updating as well as I could possibly...going almost two weeks without so much as a peep. Well, I have begun to get into the rhythm of classes and had papers due and even a test this afternoon. It's all about time management, and I'm trying my hardest. I have been taking pictures, though...and today, since I got to leave Theology class after the test was completed, I ave stationed myself at Gallagher to post them to the shiner blog. Speaking of which, I really really miss the VT food...like a lot. Subway just doesn't taste like a Vegan Club...and nothing on the salad bar at school compares to the steamed kale with nutritional yeast that I am salivating for. I went to Wild Oats last night...$18.99 for Tamari Roasted Almonds?!?!?!?!?
But the good news...well, this is what's currently in my fridge...
Oh man...did I get excited about that! I have already consumed the IPA, but I'm totally celebrating my VT roots tonight for dinner...speaking of VT...I'm currently being blamed for the recent weather...
Which began to fall on Tuesday afternoon and resulted in the following announcement...
Fine, blame me for an afternoon free of class and full of television watching...My classes resumed the next day...but my brother's high school had early dismissal as well as the next day off. I was watching TV last night, and there are schools out even today, although the roads are fairly clear at this point...and the sun is shining. What you have to understand about cincinnati is that they freak out when there is frozen precipitation...or any precipitation...and I giggle all the way home. It is frigid weather, however...I felt my fingers tingle after just a few minutes outside...and the bus is much much much less reliable when the weather sucks...Tuesday, as I left work, I missed the first bus and I had to wait and wait and wait for the next one. Luckily, it came only ten minutes past schedule...but the next bus was delayed a few HOURS! My fellow riders were trading stories last night as I rode home. One was on the #51 for FIVE HOURS...and he still had to transfer to another bus to get home.
Speaking of work, here are a few pictures of the displays that Lizzie has set up. The store is beautiful to work in...and I have really nice co-workers that I have known forever. The store is owned by a mother and daughter...I played soccer with Lizzie and her sister, and another employee, Kelly, attended grade school and high school with me. While a bit incestuous...it's also comfortable and familiar. And I don't have to do a lot of explaining of my situation, since these ladies are "in the loop" and know all about my "bohemian journey" (as they call it). I don't mind working there, especially since it's my only source of income...
This morning, I woke up to my sister calling to ask me where the nearest bagel shop was located...I persuaded her to pick me up, and we went out for a quick bite. I simply adore being back with the family. My sister and I are hanging out a few times a week, and she has applied to Xavier to attain her masters in nursing, starting in the fall. The other night, we went out to a bar and as we were talking, a boy came up to talk to us. "You girls look like you're having a great conversation!" and Caitlin and I shot each other and "Oh, Jesus" look, but allowed him to sit down. He turned out to be a decent guy...#5 of 6 siblings, so we loved that about him...but as he was talking the two of us were responding with the same words and the same tone...it was eerie, and we both noticed and we both got all googily...oh, sisters! It turned out that this boy knew our parents, who also liked him because of his big family (among other things). Smallest town on earth...for real.
I had another topic to discuss, but I can't remember it anymore, and I am getting a bit peckish...so I'm off to get some coneys and do my laundry. I do want to welcome my Theology Prof. Dr. Tan to the blog...he and I spoke about blogging today, since part of our class discussion is on-line...and he asked me for my blog address to check it out. I know I haven't make any disparaging comments about the class...but I hold fast to my opinion of the jerks in the back row that don't seem to have any respect for the class. I'm consoling myself with the fact that I'll do better in the long run...but I won't lie...I find myself thinking of ways to work their obvious lack of maturity into the discussions...in a witty way, of course.
Up next, a tour of the public bathrooms at Xavier...I've found one that still has ashtrays located in it!
Oh man...did I get excited about that! I have already consumed the IPA, but I'm totally celebrating my VT roots tonight for dinner...speaking of VT...I'm currently being blamed for the recent weather...
Which began to fall on Tuesday afternoon and resulted in the following announcement...
Fine, blame me for an afternoon free of class and full of television watching...My classes resumed the next day...but my brother's high school had early dismissal as well as the next day off. I was watching TV last night, and there are schools out even today, although the roads are fairly clear at this point...and the sun is shining. What you have to understand about cincinnati is that they freak out when there is frozen precipitation...or any precipitation...and I giggle all the way home. It is frigid weather, however...I felt my fingers tingle after just a few minutes outside...and the bus is much much much less reliable when the weather sucks...Tuesday, as I left work, I missed the first bus and I had to wait and wait and wait for the next one. Luckily, it came only ten minutes past schedule...but the next bus was delayed a few HOURS! My fellow riders were trading stories last night as I rode home. One was on the #51 for FIVE HOURS...and he still had to transfer to another bus to get home.
Speaking of work, here are a few pictures of the displays that Lizzie has set up. The store is beautiful to work in...and I have really nice co-workers that I have known forever. The store is owned by a mother and daughter...I played soccer with Lizzie and her sister, and another employee, Kelly, attended grade school and high school with me. While a bit incestuous...it's also comfortable and familiar. And I don't have to do a lot of explaining of my situation, since these ladies are "in the loop" and know all about my "bohemian journey" (as they call it). I don't mind working there, especially since it's my only source of income...
This morning, I woke up to my sister calling to ask me where the nearest bagel shop was located...I persuaded her to pick me up, and we went out for a quick bite. I simply adore being back with the family. My sister and I are hanging out a few times a week, and she has applied to Xavier to attain her masters in nursing, starting in the fall. The other night, we went out to a bar and as we were talking, a boy came up to talk to us. "You girls look like you're having a great conversation!" and Caitlin and I shot each other and "Oh, Jesus" look, but allowed him to sit down. He turned out to be a decent guy...#5 of 6 siblings, so we loved that about him...but as he was talking the two of us were responding with the same words and the same tone...it was eerie, and we both noticed and we both got all googily...oh, sisters! It turned out that this boy knew our parents, who also liked him because of his big family (among other things). Smallest town on earth...for real.
I had another topic to discuss, but I can't remember it anymore, and I am getting a bit peckish...so I'm off to get some coneys and do my laundry. I do want to welcome my Theology Prof. Dr. Tan to the blog...he and I spoke about blogging today, since part of our class discussion is on-line...and he asked me for my blog address to check it out. I know I haven't make any disparaging comments about the class...but I hold fast to my opinion of the jerks in the back row that don't seem to have any respect for the class. I'm consoling myself with the fact that I'll do better in the long run...but I won't lie...I find myself thinking of ways to work their obvious lack of maturity into the discussions...in a witty way, of course.
Up next, a tour of the public bathrooms at Xavier...I've found one that still has ashtrays located in it!
Physics class is awesome...I mean that.
I totally love my physics class, and not just because he lets us out an hour (or more) early each week. The professor is so amusing, and he knows it. For those that went to Ursuline with me, he's like Mr Neiman...for those that didn't go to UA...he's like all good science teachers...totally into his subject, with lots of self deprecating jokes, and a love of goofy ties...today was a snoopy print.
I'm settled in, I suppose...since I just celebrated my two week anniversary of being back...and it already seems like I've been back for a while. I am still really glad to be here, and it helps to have a friend that joins me for fun activities each week (so far...he's not only a student, but works in an accounting firm..so his year is about to get busier) Yesterday, we went to the Krohn Conservatory and I could have kicked myself for not bringing my camera (sorry Angela!). But there are some ok images on their website. Yesterday was downright frigid, a perfect day to go to the rainforest...even if it is just a simulated one. My favorite room was the "spring" room (as I called it, it's really the Floral Display Room...take the virtual tour)...full of tulips and daffodils and orange trees...the whole feeling was warm and joyful. Afterwards we retired to the former Rookwood Pottery Restaurant, which they have since re-named something stupid, which I will not print here...the inside of the restaurant looks pretty typical, except for the large brick kilns scattered all over the lounge...each big enough to hold a table for eight or so. For those of you that watch Antiques Roadshow, you may have seen Rookwood Pottery come up...it's a world famous pottery house that produced ceramics at the end of the 19th and into the 20th century...it has since been shut down, but pieces still surface. After a few bloody mary's (for me...I love bloody's!) I met the family for dinner and learned that my 17 year old brother is expected to grow another two inches at least...topping him off at 6'7"...the tallest Horan man ever to walk the earth!
Today I had a class and a resume critique and then physics, which starts at 6PM and is supposed to go until 10, but the professor let us go at 8:30...getting back to the subject of my entry...I'm off to change and go to a meeting of the Business Fraternity on campus...Phi Beta something greek...hey...free pizza.
Beating Dayton...a Xavier tradition
Tomorrow is the big game against the Dayton Flyers, and my dad and I are totally going and totally wearing matching t-shirts...it's going to be our first collegiate sporting event together since the 90's! My family are not sports fanatics by any means...but we do like games of all sorts, and especially when our team wins. With so many allegiances (sibling colleges are Clemson and Fordham and Xavier and UC, plus Ohio State by proximity)and local sports teams (Bengals, Reds)...nobody that I'm related to goes into any deep depression when anyone loses...and as Bengals fans, we DO lose. I've had boyfriends in the past that lived and died by the NCAA Men's basketball schedule...and for years after we broke up, I celebrated NOT caring about March Madness. But now, being back in a community of fans...I can find myself getting swept up into it again. I'm glad that I'm not being MADE to watch the games...and even if I am, basketball is a way shorter game than football...which cannot hold my attention at all. However, my friends Tanner and JB did give me a short list of football terms and phrases...I love going to a sporting event and looking stupid. I either get a bunch of eye rolling, and then change the subject (which is funny) or they try and explain the rules and THEN roll their eyes when they realize that I'm too far gone to bother with. Either way, it passes the time.
Speaking of time passing, my time with Norm has ended (sad) but it was so so much fun! Here are the pictures from last night's adventure...and if any of y'all visit me down south, you can expect the same good time, tempered with frequent visits to local restaurants...like
Home of the best burger and cheapest beer I've ever had...our meal consisted of two Zipburgers (one word) with cheese and "through the garden" (which means "with all the veggies") and fries and a bottle of Hudepohl, Cincinnati's distinctive brew.
Today was another day of classes and work...and my first paper for English is due Monday, and I'm getting it out of the way tonight...even though it's Friday night. Luckily, our student center has free laptops for checking out, and a 24 hour computer lab...and a bar...which one will I go to first? My paper is about defending one of four "traditions" described in my English text...and I'm drawing on my experience at City Market to write a narrative about expressive individualism within the structure of a republican tradition...not those kinds of republicans...I'm not that midwestern! I tried to visit my bar after work (Teller's is right down the street) but alas, it is Friday and the bar was already crowded at 5:30PM...full of suits.The other bar down the street was empty...but their whiskey is $5 more than Teller's...and since I'm really taking my econ class seriously, I opted for tea at the coffee shop...put my feet up and read until I had to catch the bus. Since Jinx has left, I am back to reading my book while I eat in the dining hall...but the solitary life is cool with me...I've a great deal on my mind.
Home of the best burger and cheapest beer I've ever had...our meal consisted of two Zipburgers (one word) with cheese and "through the garden" (which means "with all the veggies") and fries and a bottle of Hudepohl, Cincinnati's distinctive brew.
Today was another day of classes and work...and my first paper for English is due Monday, and I'm getting it out of the way tonight...even though it's Friday night. Luckily, our student center has free laptops for checking out, and a 24 hour computer lab...and a bar...which one will I go to first? My paper is about defending one of four "traditions" described in my English text...and I'm drawing on my experience at City Market to write a narrative about expressive individualism within the structure of a republican tradition...not those kinds of republicans...I'm not that midwestern! I tried to visit my bar after work (Teller's is right down the street) but alas, it is Friday and the bar was already crowded at 5:30PM...full of suits.The other bar down the street was empty...but their whiskey is $5 more than Teller's...and since I'm really taking my econ class seriously, I opted for tea at the coffee shop...put my feet up and read until I had to catch the bus. Since Jinx has left, I am back to reading my book while I eat in the dining hall...but the solitary life is cool with me...I've a great deal on my mind.
Hip deep in the 'nati
I have forgotten my camera cord, so I cannot post pictures from tonight, but it was really really nice! Today was all about seeing people from the past. Today at work, I ran into my preschool reading teacher, who remembered me and my large family, as she had taught at least the first three of us to read and or write. I excitedly told her that I was an English major, before I had to run and catch the bus...but not before I went to the coffee shop to get a tea and ran into my old boss Brian (whom I called Jim). While waiting for the bus I saw my friends husband, who let me know that his wife was working...at Xavier! I went to see her after class got out, and we had a great time talking about the past few years. then, Norm and I went to dinner at Zip's, which has the best burgers in the city...and $2 local bottled beer...Hudepohl...soooo west side, but it can't be beat! Then it was off to Greater's the best iced cream on god's green earth. After the eats and the sweets, we piled into the car for a tour of the ninja's childhood...including first and last apartments, homes and grade school...as well as a walking tour of the location of my wedding...no, I don't even have a boy in my life, but I've already planned my reception, invitations and ceremony...Norm approved of the site very much, and let me tell you...bringing the two parts of my life together like that was a feeling I'd been looking for. It's like Dorothy said...even though I felt far away, I was home the whole time. I love you, my friends.
A buncha pictures from the last few days...
It's Thursday, and I've just finished for the day...at 3:45. My days seems short, but they are really packed with things to do. Today I worked at my new job, a home accessories store in the middle of Hyde Park Square (for those locals and familiar)...it's like April Cornell mixed with Kiss the Cook (for you Burlingtonians)...and almost everything is breakable, which makes me very nervous! Yesterday I was helping with a display, and I was carrying $2,000 ceramic urns from here to there...it was like holding a newborn baby. The manager of the store is a great merchandiser (I think) and mostly I've just been helping her make displays...business is not as brisk as we would like...yesterday, only seven people came in...and mostly just to look. this morning, however, a woman came in and bought almost our entire window display...she spent more than I made in two weeks working at City Market!
After work, I ran to catch the bus and then another fine meal from the Xavier cafe. (a veggie burger and fries, consumed in philosophy class.) I sat in the back row for the first time ever, with three kids typing their notes on laptops, while I scribbled away in my notebook...when I snuck a peak on their screens, I saw they were IM-ing and surfing the Reno 911 website. I considered passing the girl a note about my own devotion to Clemmy and Lt. Dangle...but I decided against it.
Oh yeah, I mentioned pictures, huh?
This is The Echo diner, in Hyde Park. My grandfather and I went here after church all the time...he attended church every morning...I love The Echo, simply because, like all great diners...it hasn't changed. Same with Arthur's, the bar next door to The Echo.
I'm not sure if you can see it, but the wall behind the sign has a mural with charactatures of all the old school regulars...when I was a kid, I used to try and find people that I knew...now I just want to be on the wall myself. I'm not (and I never was) a regular by any means...but I have a few fond memories of Arthur's. It's what I thought the Daily Planet was, to me...
The following pictures are the before and after of the snowmen on our front lawn. It's been snowing and cold all week...but there's no helping these snow creatures...they are past the point of no return. Does anyone remember Calvin and Hobbes building snowmen that represented their enemies, so that as they slowly melt, Calivin can feel superior? Melting snowmen are depressing to see...
Finally, a picture of the beloved Norm eating the beloved skyline...Clifton Skyline...not the original, which is in Price Hill...but I'm an Eastsider and I cannot navigate the West Side...ask anyone from Cincinnati.
Tonight, we are going to Zips or The Echo and then...and then...GREATER'S! My first Greater's in FOREVER...and Hyde Park Greater's, to boot! We could go to Clifton Greater's, it's more traditional Iced cream shop, with the marble tables and wrought iron chairs...but HP Greater's is MY HOUSE!
I'm out, yo...I have to go to my house and perhaps do laundry, or maybe just catch my breath.
This is The Echo diner, in Hyde Park. My grandfather and I went here after church all the time...he attended church every morning...I love The Echo, simply because, like all great diners...it hasn't changed. Same with Arthur's, the bar next door to The Echo.
I'm not sure if you can see it, but the wall behind the sign has a mural with charactatures of all the old school regulars...when I was a kid, I used to try and find people that I knew...now I just want to be on the wall myself. I'm not (and I never was) a regular by any means...but I have a few fond memories of Arthur's. It's what I thought the Daily Planet was, to me...
The following pictures are the before and after of the snowmen on our front lawn. It's been snowing and cold all week...but there's no helping these snow creatures...they are past the point of no return. Does anyone remember Calvin and Hobbes building snowmen that represented their enemies, so that as they slowly melt, Calivin can feel superior? Melting snowmen are depressing to see...
Finally, a picture of the beloved Norm eating the beloved skyline...Clifton Skyline...not the original, which is in Price Hill...but I'm an Eastsider and I cannot navigate the West Side...ask anyone from Cincinnati.
Tonight, we are going to Zips or The Echo and then...and then...GREATER'S! My first Greater's in FOREVER...and Hyde Park Greater's, to boot! We could go to Clifton Greater's, it's more traditional Iced cream shop, with the marble tables and wrought iron chairs...but HP Greater's is MY HOUSE!
I'm out, yo...I have to go to my house and perhaps do laundry, or maybe just catch my breath.
Here's what feels good...finishing my homework
Sorry I have been so remiss about posting the updates to the blog...it turns out that college life makes me busy, and I am just now sitting down to rest after what feels like many days of going from place to place and learning about things. I am not complaining...no way...I am so beyond happy to be back in school...except when I am in Theology class and the children in the back row refuse to shut the hell up so that I can hear Professor Tan. I swear, I didn't even realize that I was shooting them dirty looks until halfway through class...oh yeah, I'm that girl. To be fair, we were answering questions about religious experiences, and one kid said that eating mushrooms was the most awesome experience he'd ever had. I roll my eyes.
My fellow Dagger Deb Norm is here from Vermont with a car full of things (thank you Norm!) and lots of nice warm friendship feelings. Oh, our time together has not been without it's trials...today, I had issues with the cell phone, which I also dropped and cracked...and the bank machine ATE the card we were using, sending both of us into a tizzy for the rest of the afternoon. Luckily, we ended the evening with a trip to Beelistics studio for Norm's ohio tattoo, our state flower, the scarlet carnation.
and it was an awesome experience. The artist (Tony) could not have been nicer...even if he is from the West Side...represent!
I also took the beloved Norm to the beloved skyline, where she got a 4-way (onion...nice) and appropriately enjoyed the hell out of it. Oh yes, and the whole time she's been here, I've either been in class or at work (I got a job! I started today!) or doing my homework, and she has been reading or hanging out in my so so hot apartment. Really...the apartment is fucking tropical in temperature...and one of my roommates thinks that it's cold all the time, so she turns up the heat once I turn it down. the apartment is so very hot that my other roommates actually turned on the AIR CONDITIONER...true story. But Norm is a trooper, even eating two meals with me in the dining hall...now that's friendship! I'm just glad she's here!
It has snowed a bit more since I last posted, and there appeared on our lawn a three person snowman family, complete with a mustache on the "dad" and even a snow-dog...the next day, they looked a bit worse for the wear, and I gave Norm the final directions to my house by saying "it's the one with the dilapidated snowmen in the front." She found it ASAP.
Blogger is not allowing me to post anymore pictures tonight, so I shall leave you with these images...plus, I am tired and I must rest before work and school tomorrow. I have finished my homework for the week, however, and nothing more is due from me until next Wednesday...a feeling that makes my heart flutter. Last night I was doing my economics homework (Econ, Mia!) and when I saw that I was on the last problem of the chapter, I could not help the smile that flitted across my face...I feel like a nerd a little bit...but it a really good way.
Oh yeah...I've also had my first physics class, which was much less scary than I thought...and my professor is pretty funny, actually...I mean, the jokes that he makes are mostly physics or science related...but he's super. He kept doing things (like staring directly into the laser) and then telling us not to do that...but he kept doing it because he said he was already too "far gone for it to matter". I love geeks. There is also a crucifix in our Physics lab, a fact I think is so funny...even though this is a religious school, the Jesuits have a healthy view of science...but "everything under God" I suppose. I wonder if I can answer any of my physics questions with "Because of Jesus!"
and it was an awesome experience. The artist (Tony) could not have been nicer...even if he is from the West Side...represent!
I also took the beloved Norm to the beloved skyline, where she got a 4-way (onion...nice) and appropriately enjoyed the hell out of it. Oh yes, and the whole time she's been here, I've either been in class or at work (I got a job! I started today!) or doing my homework, and she has been reading or hanging out in my so so hot apartment. Really...the apartment is fucking tropical in temperature...and one of my roommates thinks that it's cold all the time, so she turns up the heat once I turn it down. the apartment is so very hot that my other roommates actually turned on the AIR CONDITIONER...true story. But Norm is a trooper, even eating two meals with me in the dining hall...now that's friendship! I'm just glad she's here!
It has snowed a bit more since I last posted, and there appeared on our lawn a three person snowman family, complete with a mustache on the "dad" and even a snow-dog...the next day, they looked a bit worse for the wear, and I gave Norm the final directions to my house by saying "it's the one with the dilapidated snowmen in the front." She found it ASAP.
Blogger is not allowing me to post anymore pictures tonight, so I shall leave you with these images...plus, I am tired and I must rest before work and school tomorrow. I have finished my homework for the week, however, and nothing more is due from me until next Wednesday...a feeling that makes my heart flutter. Last night I was doing my economics homework (Econ, Mia!) and when I saw that I was on the last problem of the chapter, I could not help the smile that flitted across my face...I feel like a nerd a little bit...but it a really good way.
Oh yeah...I've also had my first physics class, which was much less scary than I thought...and my professor is pretty funny, actually...I mean, the jokes that he makes are mostly physics or science related...but he's super. He kept doing things (like staring directly into the laser) and then telling us not to do that...but he kept doing it because he said he was already too "far gone for it to matter". I love geeks. There is also a crucifix in our Physics lab, a fact I think is so funny...even though this is a religious school, the Jesuits have a healthy view of science...but "everything under God" I suppose. I wonder if I can answer any of my physics questions with "Because of Jesus!"
The girl from the north country
Last night/this morning I went to bed at 5AM after reading my book AND watching "V for Vendetta" (which was wonderful)...and there was no snow on the ground. I woke up 5.5 hours later to a call from my Dad "You know this is all your fault" he said (sarcastically) into the phone. I pulled my head off the pillow and saw the fresh three inches of snow that had fallen in the time I was dreaming. Sure, the snow just followed me here. It's nice to see, thought...familiar. Last night was kind of a trip. I was in my pj's watching the movie when two girls (friends of the roomies) came in asking if there were any boys in the girls room. Confused, I said no, and they proceeded to push past me and barge into the bedroom, rousing one of the girls out of bed and screaming about a fight with a boyfriend or ex-boyfriend. Tears and sreaming and traded cell phone calls went on for all of 10 minutes, until I (in the words of Scissorfight) "Put the Hammer Down"...demanding that anyone that didn't live in my house was to "...vacate the house before I get super pissed." It pays to be older sometimes. These girls were just wasted and after fighting with their boyfriends, decided to come over and find my roommates to fight with. I'm sure that's not the whole story, but I don't give a fuck...get out of my house when I'm trying to watch a movie. I'm not sure if this girl will remember what she did last night, but I'm not into drama in the casa. Speaking of which, here's a blurry-ish (sorry) picture of my new digs. I'm on the first floor, with three girls, and three more girls live upstairs from us.
I'm in the student center again, blogging before I catch the bus to Hyde Park and hang in the bookstore, reading magazines...or I'll clean the bathroom...hmmm, which sounds more appealing?
I'm in the student center again, blogging before I catch the bus to Hyde Park and hang in the bookstore, reading magazines...or I'll clean the bathroom...hmmm, which sounds more appealing?
A day of art...an evening with an adult
Today was really enjoyable. I woke up late and cleaned up after my roommates party. It's not going to become a habit, hope...the cleaning I mean, not the party...but it did give me the excuse to vacuum the place. Running the vacuum is like shaving my legs...soooooo enjoyable, especially when there's lots to get rid of. After enjoying another glorious meal courtesy of Xavier, I caught the bus for a quick ride into the city to meet the boy for an afternoon of art.I wasn't allowed to take pictures in the museum itself, but the show that we went to see was really wonderful (I thought)...albeit short and sweet....one of the things I liked best about the Charley Harper show was the actual way the pieces were displayed. Next to that show was a room of video and assemblage pieces from performance artists, piquing many conversations between the boy and I about what art really was. Surprisingly, he responded to the pieces that I thought were a bit passe...there were whole corners of the room piled high with discarded furniture...as we turned the corner, he said "now, I like this." and I stifled a giggle thinking that I could have saved time and just taken him to ReCycle North, or my apartment. As for the rest of the museum...well...there wasn't much to the rest of the museum. The CAC doesn't have a permanent gallery, and I guess the winter is not the time that the museum packs them in. I did drag him down to the basement to see a few moments of Warhol's film "Empire"...an eight hour single shot of the Empire State Building. We came in during the evening shot, so the only thing visible were the lights...and then every so often some random flashes, like satellites or something. I had heard so much about the film, I was, at first sort of let down by the screening...but then I found myself thinking about what the random lights meant...where were they coming from...and why did Warhol do this in the first place...all the questions Andy wanted me to think about. I wanted to stay longer. I also thought a lot about Tyrone and the rest of the sardines and remembered the Green Door Art Hop installation they did a few years ago. I miss those kids. After the movie, we went to the top floor to the UnMuseum...the interactive kids area, which actually had the coolest piece (I thought)...an elephant made of cloth with all sorts of drawers fit into the side...each drawer housing a unique diorama...right up Martha's alley! Once we had exhausted the contemporary art (it took all of 30 minutes) he suggested that we go to the top of the Carew Tower, the tallest building in Cincinnati, where the following pictures were taken.
I used to work in the brown and black striped building...on the 19th floor.
We stayed up on the roof for a while, sharing memories of downtown and talking about the past few years...and asking random questions of each other. Actually, he was asking lots of the questions...I was feeling a bit selfish, talking about myself and my past more that I was giving back to him. I must work on that. As we spoke, I noticed that my name had been scratched into the paint on the guardrail
(click to enlarge...it's there, I swear.)
Once the sun went down, the beautiful day became a beautiful but frosty evening, and we retired to the Palm Court for drinks...
and then to a new chinese restaurant for dinner. Over drinks, he and I finally had a conversation about what had gone down between us in the last few months, which (I hope) cleared the air between us...I'm not going into details or anything...nor will I name names...but I think that after tonight, things will be a little easier between us. The thing I like best about this one is that he likes to talk and not just about himself or his feelings...he asks thoughtful questions and random ones as well. Should nuns and priests be allowed to marry? I'm not sure...but it's fun to debate. I suggested to him that we meet weekly just to hang out and talk...he seemed amenable to the suggestion, and we have tentative plans to go to the "regular" art museum next time. I got the feeling that Contemporary Art wasn't really his thing, but that's cool...classic artwork isn't my thing, but it beats sitting on my ass watching TV, which I am about to do tonight. My roommates and I still don't have cable, but they have a great movie selection and tonight I'm screening "V for Vendetta"...or I'll retire to my room and read my Econ. book. It's not as boring as it sounds! We're reading "Nickel and Dimed (On (not) Getting by in America)" and it's really enjoyable. I suggest that y'all read it, although it's depressing...in that it deals with the struggle of the working poor, which I related to, coming from my background in Burlington...no degree and working in high-stress minimum wage jobs...scraping by from paycheck to paycheck. Ugh. One of the other boys from the past just called me (at 12:30 AM) and demanded I come out with them...why couldn't they have called me earlier...when the goddamn bus is running? I can already hear Werner thinking "This is why you should be driving a car!" yeah yeah yeah...but parking is $13 and that's a bitch.
I used to work in the brown and black striped building...on the 19th floor.
We stayed up on the roof for a while, sharing memories of downtown and talking about the past few years...and asking random questions of each other. Actually, he was asking lots of the questions...I was feeling a bit selfish, talking about myself and my past more that I was giving back to him. I must work on that. As we spoke, I noticed that my name had been scratched into the paint on the guardrail
(click to enlarge...it's there, I swear.)
Once the sun went down, the beautiful day became a beautiful but frosty evening, and we retired to the Palm Court for drinks...
and then to a new chinese restaurant for dinner. Over drinks, he and I finally had a conversation about what had gone down between us in the last few months, which (I hope) cleared the air between us...I'm not going into details or anything...nor will I name names...but I think that after tonight, things will be a little easier between us. The thing I like best about this one is that he likes to talk and not just about himself or his feelings...he asks thoughtful questions and random ones as well. Should nuns and priests be allowed to marry? I'm not sure...but it's fun to debate. I suggested to him that we meet weekly just to hang out and talk...he seemed amenable to the suggestion, and we have tentative plans to go to the "regular" art museum next time. I got the feeling that Contemporary Art wasn't really his thing, but that's cool...classic artwork isn't my thing, but it beats sitting on my ass watching TV, which I am about to do tonight. My roommates and I still don't have cable, but they have a great movie selection and tonight I'm screening "V for Vendetta"...or I'll retire to my room and read my Econ. book. It's not as boring as it sounds! We're reading "Nickel and Dimed (On (not) Getting by in America)" and it's really enjoyable. I suggest that y'all read it, although it's depressing...in that it deals with the struggle of the working poor, which I related to, coming from my background in Burlington...no degree and working in high-stress minimum wage jobs...scraping by from paycheck to paycheck. Ugh. One of the other boys from the past just called me (at 12:30 AM) and demanded I come out with them...why couldn't they have called me earlier...when the goddamn bus is running? I can already hear Werner thinking "This is why you should be driving a car!" yeah yeah yeah...but parking is $13 and that's a bitch.
you've gotta be kidding me...it's only 10pm?
I succumbed to my desire for napping and took a two hour siesta this afternoon...only to be awakened by a call from the art museum rendez-vous boy. We spoke for a while, me a bit groggy and he full of questions about my past at City Market...did I feel that I was valued...was I part of a team? My answers were all nap-induced, and I found myself (predictably) making weird analogies about the problems with City Market...likening the management to a paint splatter. He and I have decided to meet at the "new" Cincinnati Contemporary Art Center tomorrow which has an exhibit by Charley Harper, whom I love. Perhaps after, we'll go out to dinner or something. I want to hang out with people so badly that I'm going out with a boy that told me I was a poor investment over Christmas. Granted, he has since made amends...awkwardly...but he does keep calling and the others just promise to call and then leave me hanging. What's a girl to think? Especially when she walks home...to her only safe haven, and there's five girls screaming and getting drunk. I feel displaced.
Now, I'm in front of the TV at the student center, watching "The Mexican" on TBS and blogging. My bar was too crowded for me to hang out with a book and Jameson, so I went directly to Awakenings and had a boozy coffee...I kind of just want to sleep now, but I can't go home yet.
Living with people is weird...not even because of the roommates...more due to the fact that I have no control over who comes over. Last night, in my PJ's and watching crappy TV, I had to get up and answer the door twice for random people...none of which my roomies even remembered came over the next day. I think these girls are alright...we're just from a different generation. I want to relax in my home and party outside, they only have the apartment.
Now I'm getting all wrapped up in "The Mexican" a movie I believe is the illustration of the inherent problem with the American Economy. If you have never seen it, the movie itself is pretty cute, with nice dialogue and original story. The secondary character casting is unique...some predictable (James Gandolfini as the gangster) and other lesser know people (like the child-psychologist from tv's Law and Order) but, in my opinion...the entire thing is ruined by the casting of Brad Pitt and Julia Roberts. The whole movie, I can't stop concentrating on the "star power", which completely overshadows the story aspect. It's like seeing a Hummer being driven by a soccer mom...sure it gets you to you kids soccer game...but so would a Prius. Plus, what could they have spent the extra $$ on, if they didn't have to give Julia $40 million and points on the gross?
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